In 1978, Billy Joel released The Stranger, an album that would go on to define his career and cement his place in music history. Among its standout tracks was “She’s Always a Woman,” a song that quietly became a fan favorite thanks to its delicate melody and layered, emotionally complex lyrics.
But here’s the twist: despite its popularity, Joel largely stopped performing the song live just a couple of years after its release—leaving many fans wondering why.
At first listen, “She’s Always a Woman” feels like a tender love song. Its lyrics paint a portrait of a woman who is strong, flawed, contradictory, and deeply human:
“She can lead you to love, she can take you or leave you
She can ask for the truth, but she’ll never believe you…”
The song was written about Joel’s first wife, Elizabeth Weber, who also managed his career during a crucial period of his rise. Their relationship, however, was far from simple. The two began dating while she was still married to Jon Small—Joel’s friend and former musical collaborator—which added tension and complexity from the very beginning.
Weber was known for being tough, assertive, and highly capable in business. Those qualities earned her criticism from people around Joel, and “She’s Always a Woman” became, in many ways, his response.
Joel himself explained that the song wasn’t meant to criticize her—it was meant to defend her.
The structure of the lyrics reinforces that idea: a series of perceived flaws or criticisms is followed by a quiet but unwavering conclusion—“she’s always a woman to me.” In other words, others may judge her harshly, but his perspective is different. He sees the full person behind the reputation.
Despite this intention, not everyone interpreted the song that way. Some listeners accused Joel of portraying women negatively, even calling the song misogynistic. Joel pushed back on that interpretation in interviews, emphasizing that the song is about perspective. What someone appears to be from the outside can be very different from how they are experienced by someone who loves them.
Still, the personal nature of the song—and the eventual breakdown of his marriage to Weber in 1982—likely contributed to Joel’s decision to remove it from his live performances for decades. From around 1980 until 2005, the song was mostly absent from his setlists.
When he finally brought it back, he added a touch of dry humor at the end of performances, often remarking, “And then we got divorced.” It’s a line that gets a laugh, but it also underscores how deeply personal the song remains.
“She’s Always a Woman” stands as one of Joel’s most nuanced compositions—not just a love song, but a reflection on loyalty, perception, and the complicated nature of relationships. Like much of The Stranger, it captures emotional contradictions in a way that feels honest rather than polished.
And maybe that’s why it still resonates: it doesn’t try to simplify love. It shows it as it is—messy, imperfect, and deeply real.